ANGEL

By Morticia

52- 55/60

JACQUELINE

We were in our quarters as the Enterprise approached DS9; Owen was slumped despondently in one of the over-stuffed chairs in our lounge. The guest quarters in this new Sovereign class Enterprise were luxurious. It was incongruous to be so physically comfortable when we were in so much psychological pain.

Regrets hung like oppressive clouds over all of us. In the privacy of our quarters Owen had deflated from his bombastic, arrogant persona and had the appearance of an old man, pensive, guilt-ridden and unsure.

And even in my own guilt and grief I couldn’t help but compare him unfavorably with Jean-Luc’s vibrancy. Jean-Luc finally had a chance to put a terrible wrong right, and it filled him with an unearthly passion. Owen’s chance to put things right only seemed to oppress him. The contrast between the two men was unsettling to say the least.

Regrets. They drowned me. So many mistakes, so many wrong choices, so much hurt and pain caused by a decision made so many years ago, a secret pact that should never have been made.

Jean-Luc had been Captain of the Stargazer when I had first met him. He was fiery, self-assured. He was a rising star in Starfleet but he had no wish for a family or a wife, or even an Admiralship. He just wanted command of his own ship and a fair wind to sail her on.

To be honest, and I suppose I have to start being honest now, I got pregnant deliberately. I was sure that Jean-Luc would relent and marry me. I even visited his parents Maurice and Yvette to tell them the happy news while Jean-Luc was still away on a mission.

And that’s when I met Owen, in the front room of the Picard family home in Labarre. He was having a long discussion about wine with Jean-Luc’s older brother Robert. Robert was making no secret of the fact that he thought Jean-Luc had turned his back on the family business, that he would never settle down and have a family and take responsibilities seriously. He was a swashbuckling, derring-do, overgrown schoolboy who would never amount to anything more than a Starfleet Captain.

Seeing Jean-Luc through his brother’s eyes, comparing him with the solid respectable and reliable presence of Owen, and possibly suffering from the hormonal stresses of my pregnancy, I made a decision that would ruin all of our lives. I decided that Owen should be the father of my unborn child.

But I don’t accept all the blame. Had Jean-Luc refused to let me go, had he insisted on marrying me after all, I would have agreed. But he seemed relieved to be released from the responsibility. Owen KNEW I was carrying Jean-Luc’s child. He swore he would bring Tom up as his own and I believed him.

Naïve? Not really, because the Paris family genes carry hemophilia. Although Owen had been fortunate enough to only suffer a mild version of the disease, he understood that the odds were that any male child of his would have the full symptoms. Owen wouldn’t risk having a son of his own. The boy child I carried was his only hope for immortality and the continuation of the Paris name.

The cost of Owen’s acceptance of Tom, was the solemn oath from Jean-Luc that he would never, under any circumstances, reveal that Tom was his son. In return for the promise, Owen would bring Tom up as his own.

And Owen really DID love Tom. But the problem was that every time Tom failed at something, some insidious voice in the back of Owen’s head would whisper that if Tom had been his ‘real’ son he would have done better. The fact that Jeanette and Elisabeth were so tractable only confirmed his beliefs and as the years went on Owen became more unreasonable in his demands and Tom became inevitably more likely to fail him.

Caldik Prime was a watershed for us all. Despite his renouncement of Tom, his declaration that Tom was no longer his son, Owen point-blank refused Jean-Luc’s request to interfere. And I, thinking that Owen’s refusal was proof that he WOULD eventually forgive Tom, also denied Jean-Luc’s plea.

Jean-Luc had only just recovered from his experiences at Celtris III, where he had been captured and tortured by the Cardassians. The torture, coming so closely on the heels of his assimilation by the Borg in 2366, had evidently caused him to re-evaluate his life. He was beginning to feel old, he was starting to regret the fact that he had never married, and he had finally lost his aversion to children and was looking back with regret at his surrender of Tom.

Tom’s capture as a Maquis and trial and subsequent imprisonment must have ripped his heart apart, but still the Picard honor kept him from interfering where he had given up all rights.

Then in 2371 Jean-Luc’s brother and nephew were killed and he spiraled into a depression. He contacted me in his lonely agony, begging for the chance to finally acknowledge his relationship to Tom. Unfortunately, the call came the day after Voyager disappeared into the badlands and was lost.

Looking at Owen’s defeated face, I spared a little sympathy for the agony he was going through. What had it cost him to call on Tom’s birth father for aid now? Definitely more than I would have ever believed him willing to pay.

We had all three made mistakes and Tom had always paid the price.

Well, no more, if we were all sacrificed in the oncoming storms then so be it, finally we would put right the wrongs that we had done our son.

~~~

CHAKOTAY

It seemed an interminable wait before my hails to the surface were accepted, and instead of one of my brothers replying I was shocked to see the grim countenance of Wabashaw, the chief elder of the Dorvan government.

"Chakotay, you have finally returned to us." He said mildly enough but his eyes were tight with tension.

"I have come to beg sanctuary, grandfather" I replied humbly, my familial term was not literal, but a respectful acknowledgement of his age and wisdom.

"You are bringing great trouble with you, child, there are many people who are following you in wrath. Have you forgotten that you do not live to yourself alone but to your tribe and clan?"

"I know, I’m sorry that I return as a fugitive and bring such danger on the tribe. Should I leave and lead away the menace from your hearth?" I closed my eyes in fear of his answer.

"We are your family, Chakotay, the tribe will gather around you and protect you like a she-wolf protects her cub against the outsiders, but be warned, if you or your companions have transgressed against OUR laws, then we WILL exact a penalty. If you wish our protection you must accept our judgment. The council will meet and decide your fate."

I swallowed heavily. The judgment of the Elders was not a light thing to agree to and yet I had no other choice, I could only pray that Kolopak had been right. If Tom were truly my life-mate then the council would accept our actions. If not, then he would be taken from me and returned to his own people.

"I agree to abide by your wisdom, grandfather." I said quietly and an approving smile lit the old man’s face.

"Then welcome, Chakotay, come down and bring your companions too. Our honor demands that their safety is also guaranteed as long as they remain within our protection."

I had depended on that, the fact that any outsider, even a mortal enemy of the tribe, would be protected as our own if they were our guest.

Then Wabashaw looked more closely at The Doctor and Neelix. His eyes were puzzled. "Which of these is the Wamanon?" He asked in bewilderment.

I flinched at his words. The comical absurdity of him thinking that either the Talaxian or the Doctor was Tom was completely overshadowed by his terminology.

Stiffening I looked him proudly in the eyes

"TOM is not here, he is preparing himself to meet you. As my Husband he is honoring you by cleansing and fasting before the meeting." And even as I said the words, I thanked the spirits that Tom had not eaten the soup after all, since I couldn’t have lied to an Elder.

Wabashaw blinked in astonished approval but still he looked at me sadly and confirmed what I already suspected

"A challenge has been issued. A member of the tribe says ‘Tom’ is Wamanon, we will not acknowledge your marriage until the charge is refuted."

"I understand. But you will give him welcome and protection?"

"Of course, until judgment is made or refused. He is not of the tribe, if he refuses our right to judge him he must be returned to his people."

I nodded reluctantly, it was more than I could have expected but less than I had hoped for.

"Tom is – fragile." I told Wabashaw desperately "He needs gentleness and healing."

Wabashaw gave me a reproachful smile and replied gently

"We will not harm your Tom by word or deed. If he needs healing we will give it. If he wants our protection he may have it."

"For now." I challenged

"For now" Wabashaw confirmed sadly.

I closed the transmission and began to program our descent. For a few minutes Neelix and The Doctor watched me quietly, pondering our "welcome" and then finally Neelix spoke

"What does WAMANON mean?"

I punched the controls angrily while I composed myself to answer

"Thief. A Wamanon is a thief."

"What member of your tribe would call Tom a thief?" Neelix asked in confusion.

Before I could reply, a sad soft voice answered his question

"Angel."

I turned and saw Tom swaying in the doorway, his face pale, his eyes bleak and hopeless.

"Come here, babe" I whispered, opening my arms and gratefully he moved forward and sat on my lap, letting my arms enfold him as he trembled against me, his face pressed into my neck for comfort.

"I told you they would hate me" he snuffled miserably

"They don’t hate you Tom, they are willing to reserve judgment until the facts are known. They are good people. They WILL help us."

"But I AM Wamanon, Chak. I always knew you were HIS." He whispered

"That was MY mistake, Tom. It is I who has wronged Angel, not you, and it is I who will have to face the judgment. I will not let them judge YOU in this. You have done nothing wrong."

"But either way, we could be forced to part," Tom said sadly.

And as much as I wanted to comfort him, I had promised that there would be no more lies between us, so I just hugged him to me in desperate sadness as Neelix took over the controls and carried us down to the surface.

~~~

HARRY

When the cell door opened, I shot to my feet in a mix of panic and relief. It was Captain Picard himself, my childhood hero, surely HE would listen to what I had to say?

He was followed into the room by a stunning brunette, who gave me such a gentle smile that I almost cried. It was the first time in two days that anyone had treated me as anything other than a despicable criminal.

"Ensign Harry Kim, I have been appointed to represent you in your Court Martial. You have the right to request another attorney if you prefer." Captain Picard said to me coldly, his eyes flint-like, his face completely expressionless.

I gulped heavily. He certainly didn’t seem to be sympathetic to my plight, but then again, I had to trust someone and the Captain’s reputation for fairness was legendary.

"I would be honored to have you represent me." I said with quiet deference

And then he smiled at me, and it was like the sun suddenly coming out on a cloudy day. I felt my knees weaken with relief even as his sunny smile reminded me oddly enough of Tom.

"Sit down, Ensign, this is Deanna Troi, ship’s counselor on the Enterprise. Unless you have any objection, I would like her to sit in on our interview."

Deanna Troi. The wheels turned in my head at the realisation.

"You’re a Betazoid!" I exclaimed excitedly

"Half-Betazoid" She corrected gently

"But – but you can tell if a person lies, can’t you? I mean you will know whether I am telling the truth or not?"

"Yes" She replied

"Is that a problem, Ensign Kim?" Captain Picard asked

And I swear my own smile put his to shame

"It’s WONDERFUL" I exclaimed happily and although I knew he had never met them, it was as though he really CARED about Tom and Chakotay’s innocence because his steely eyes softened and a look of eager anticipation filled his face.

"Why don’t you tell me EVERYTHING?" he said

Part 53 

TOM

I clung to Chakotay like a petrified child for the whole descent down to Dorvan. We were buffeted by the atmospheric entry but instead of insisting that I sat down properly he hugged me fiercly as though he alone could protect me from danger.

I had lost the strength that had infused me on DS9, It seemed that Passamaquoddy had abandoned me and I was alone again. No, that wasn’t right. I wasn’t alone, I was with Chakotay, at least until he was taken from me again.

I remembered the words of the Thunderbird, that I had to fight for what I wanted, but I didn’t feel capable of fighting anyone, let alone the whole of Starfleet and Chakotay’s family to boot.

I was a Wamanon, a thief; I had taken what wasn’t mine. The fact that I couldn’t live without Chakotay was no excuse. I had stolen him and I would have to pay the price, and the price would be to lose him again. So I shivered and clung to him, wishing I could crawl under his very skin so that we could never be parted again, and I prayed desperately to whatever capricious spirits existed to save us.

OWEN

I looked at Picard in complete disbelief.

"You’re insane" I snapped angrily "I have known Kathryn Janeway for years. She is an exemplary officer, a fine Captain. You cannot seriously take the word of an Ensign against her"

"Counselor Troi confirmed that Ensign Kim was speaking the truth."

"Humph, the truth as HE sees it perhaps, that is hardly the same as it being the REAL truth."

Picard nodded his acceptance of my qualification but then continued his outrageous accusations

"I have inspected the Official Logs, they prove that Chakotay was a fine First Officer who never acted improperly. The facts do not correspond to Captain Janeway’s assertion that he was always and foremost a dangerous Maquis who she needed to keep in line."

"Kathryn has explained those entries. She knew that Chakotay had access to the logs, she couldn’t risk him rebelling so she slanted the reports to keep him docile."

Picard merely cocked his eyebrow at my words in evident scorn. Damn the man. Who the hell did he think he was anyway?

"Surely you are not suggesting that Tuvok, a Vulcan, is also lying about the occurrences on Voyager?" I challenged.

"Well, there’s another problem, Admiral. Tuvok’s report does NOT confirm that of the Captain. He has numerous odd deletions in his files that correspond with the files that the Captain has added."

"That’s because HIS files were the true ones. Kathryn deleted them off his records and inserted them in her own after Chakotay was seen in his true light."

"That is ONE explanation. The other is that unable to lie, he has merely refrained from comment and has deleted records that prove Captain Janeway’s additions to be false."

"Preposterous. Why the hell would he do such a thing?"

"Loyalty to his Captain? Protectiveness towards his wife? Or perhaps to cover up his own misdeeds too."

"You go too far, Picard." I warned him grimly

"Perhaps I don’t go far enough, Admiral. I have spoken to Tuvok, with Counselor Troi, and it is her opinion that he is being deliberately evasive. He is feeling a great deal of guilt and concern."

"It simply doesn’t make sense. Why go to such lengths just to cover up the fact that Tuvok proved to be a poor counselor even if it IS true? No one would blame him for believing that Tom should be kept away from Chakotay. Hell, he slit his bloody wrists because the bastard abandoned him on his wedding day!"

"Because the cover-up is not about Tom’s illness, or his relationship with Chakotay. It is to hide the fact that Captain Kathryn Janeway willfully and maliciously attempted to abandon Tom on an alien planet and when Chakotay refused to let her, she was prepared to leave him too."

"According to Ensign Kim" I scoffed

"Yes"

"But why? Why the hell would a Starfleet Captain do such a thing? The idea is insane!"

"I don’t know, but I intend to find out. I am going to talk to Captain Janeway next."

"No you aren’t" I snapped firmly, this madness had gone on long enough and none of it was helping us find Tom.

"What?"

"This madness stops here. I will not have Kathryn dragged through the mud because of one sniveling ensign who is still too wet behind the ears to know what he is talking about. I order you to cease your investigations immediately."

"You can’t do that!" Picard challenged me impertinently

"I just did!"

"As Ensign Kim’s attorney I have the right to question all of the parties involved."

"There will be no Court Martial." I replied smugly, without the court martial there was no reason for Picard to be involved any longer. It had been a mistake to involve him at all.

"What?"

"I will issue an honorable, medical discharge for the Ensign and that will be the end of the matter."

"Don’t you care about the truth?"

"I know the truth. Tom has been kidnapped by a ruthless terrorist. He is ill and in need of medical care. The rest is just romantic foolishness."

"But what if Kim is telling the truth? If Tom loves Chakotay you will destroy him." Picard replied as though Tom’s welfare was his business. Well it wasn’t and I would put him straight here and now.

"I think that this Chakotay has already had a damned good try at that already. I know you feel aggrieved, that you blame me for the way Tom turned out. But at least I was prepared to give him my name – which is more than YOU ever did. It’s a bit late to play concerned father now, Picard."

I saw him swallowing convulsively as the barb hit home

"Dismissed, Captain." I said firmly and turned away from him to check that Jacqueline had witnessed my dismissal of the arrogant bastard, but she was no longer in the room.

"Admiral, I must insist - "

"I said DISMISSED!" I snapped

As I watched him stalk furiously away, I wondered where the hell Jacqueline had disappeared to.

Bloody families, sometimes they were more trouble than they were worth!

JACQUELINE

Damn her, damn the bitch. She had tried to leave my Tommy behind on some mud ball Delta Quadrant planet and I was damned well going to find out why!

I wasn’t naïve enough to think that Janeway would simply confess her crime, whatever it was she was covering up. I knew she had lied, because Ensign Kim was apparently telling the truth. I needed Deanna’s help and I needed it before anyone had a chance to order her not to assist me.

I left the two men arguing, knowing full well that Owen would not relent and Jean-Luc would be helpless to disobey a direct order from a superior officer.

When I entered Deanna’s quarters she immediately realised that I was in a state of agitation, and I knew that my only chance of gaining her co-operation was the truth.

"What’s wrong Jacqueline?" She asked and it all came pouring out.

She said nothing until I finished, just staring at me with those strange black eyes as though she could see through to my very soul.

"But what about Harry Kim?" She asked in confusion

"Owen will cancel the Court Martial, saying Kim is mentally unstable."

"And Dr. Bashir?"

"He was fooled completely by Tom, and acted in good faith, not realising that Tom was insane."

Deanna laughed

"There seems to be a strange infection of insanity amongst the crew of Voyager." She muttered

"If you don’t agree with Captain Janeway’s version of events, you are labeled as mad." I agreed

She nodded grimly.

"I’m not a telepath, I’m an empath, but I know when someone is mad or sane, Ensign Kim is a perfectly normal, rational young man, it is ludicrous to say he is insane."

"So perhaps it is also ludicrous to say that Tom is insane, and if so, then Chakotay cannot possibly be the villain he is being portrayed as." I stated firmly

Deanna bit her lower lip in contemplation before replying.

"I think that the medical records on Tom prove that he is severely depressed and capable of acts of desperation, but no, I also agree that it is a huge leap between depression and insanity."

"Then you will help me?"

"What do you want me to do?"

"Come with me to see Kathryn Janeway."

"I can’t come officially."

"We can simply make a house call, it is only polite to say hello!" I displayed my best innocent smile

Deanna laughed

"Indeed, we wouldn’t want to be ‘impolite’"

We grinned at each other, co-conspirators.

"Lets go," I urged, and Deanna jumped to her feet to follow me.

JEAN-LUC

Admiral Paris was an overblown, egotistical, narrow-minded stupid OAF.

If he imagined that his rude dismissal of me would curtail my investigations in any way, he was going to have a very rude awakening.

The key to unlock the conspiracy, and I was beginning to be damned sure there was one, was to find the true ship’s logs and the missing reports of the EMH. The official assumption was that they had been stolen at the same time that he his program had been removed.

My own suspicion was that the records had gone the same way as the holes in Tuvok’s report. Given the fact that Voyager’s EMH was said to be a self-aware individual and Ensign Kim swore he had been a staunch defender of Tom and Chakotay, I was beginning to wonder whether he had actually joined their escape by choice.

No matter how clever you were, you couldn’t completely erase computer files, somewhere there would be a ghost, an echo of the missing information and my Second Officer was just the person for the job.

Data would find the missing files, I was sure of it.

CHAKOTAY

Because I could feel the wild hammering of Tom’s heart as his painfully thin chest pressed against me, I didn’t take over the controls again, I just hugged him and let Neelix land the small craft. To my surprise and considerable relief he did a beautiful job of it, we barely felt the touchdown.

I had underestimated the little Talaxian. Come to think of it, I had shown remarkably poor judgment about a lot of people, particularly Tom.

I kissed his forehead gently

"Come on babe, time to go."

Reluctantly he climbed off me and stood shakily by the door. I turned to Neelix and the Doctor

"Thanks Neelix, that was a beautiful landing" I told him and he preened under my praise. "Doctor, I suggest you uncouple some of the ship’s power packs. We have very little artificial power on Dorvan and you will need energy to run your mobile emitter."

The Doctor looked at me in shock as my words sank in and then he hastily began to remove some energy cells from the engine compartment.

"Okay, then. Let’s do it." I said, straightening my shoulders as though to run a gauntlet and taking one of Tom’s cold hands in my own, I walked to the door and opened it.

In the few minutes it had taken us to prepare to disembark, the previously deserted landing field had been flooded with people. Tears filled my eyes as I saw my entire family waiting for me. I started to drag Tom forward to meet them with me but he planted his feet and clung to the doorframe with surprising strength.

"You go" he urged "you go first"

I looked at his terrified face and nodded. As much as I hated leaving him alone for even a moment, I knew he was right, I needed to greet my family alone first.

Tearing myself away from him I ran forward to meet them. My mother had aged since our last meting, her hair was pure silver now and her face showed more lines, but to me she was the most beautiful woman in the universe. I grabbed her around the waist and swung her into my arms in ecstasy. I had always feared that my return home would be too late.

My brothers crowded around us, clasping my back, and murmuring welcomes, my sisters were shyer, hovering uncertainly until Bey and Nayib drew them into our mass embrace and we all clung together in a desperate re-affirmation of our family.

It was not until we had drawn apart, my mother still clinging firmly to my arm as though she was afraid I might vanish again, that anybody spoke and it was of course Beyvahl, as the head of the family, who brought up the subject of Tom.

"Wabashaw told us you were home, he also told us that you have many people hunting you and that you have requested sanctuary."

"Yes" I confirmed

"Is it also true that you have taken a new mate, and abandoned your honor?" He asked coldly, no trace of his earlier welcome now; his eyes were harsh and unyielding.

I felt my mother’s hand squeeze my arm reassuringly and I controlled my temper. Bey’s question was fair, if harsh, and as the head of our household he had the right to demand my answer.

"Yes it is true that I am married. I met my life-mate, the keeper of my soul. I was true to my spirit guide and my ancestors when I gave myself to him. I have not abandoned my honor, I have reclaimed it." I asserted proudly

Bey’s eyes softened a little at my words but still he challenged me:

"And what of Angel, the one you were promised to, the one we brought into the tribe."

I stiffened angrily, "I promised not to leave him, but I had no choice. The spirits flung me away from him and on my path home I discovered my true life mate. As for your acceptance of him into the tribe, this happened in my absence, I gave no vote, I sang no song for him, his status within our people has no bearing on my choice of Tom as my husband."

Beyvahl smiled slightly as he abandoned his role and replied in a more normal vein

"You’ve opened a whole bloody can of worms with this, Chakotay. The Elders won’t accept your husband unless they are convinced that you have acted honorably, and as a family we cannot condone you either, but personally, I’ve got to admit that I never liked that bloody Angel anyway, nobody should be that damned good-looking." He laughed and clasped me around the shoulders

"So where is this ‘Wamanon’ then?" he asked

"Please, Bey, don’t even joke about it. Tom is too vulnerable." I begged urgently and my older brother looked at me in surprise.

I turned back to the ship and called Tom, who was hiding in the doorway like a scared rabbit.

Slowly, reluctantly, he emerged, blinking against the bright sunlight, his halting limp and emaciated frame bringing a collective gasp from my family.

I felt Bey’s arm tighten around me in sympathy, as Nayib muttered "You left Angel for THAT?" in thoughtless amazement.

Tom’s painful approach slowed progressively until he finally froze a few feet in front of us, his face white, his blue eyes terrified as he scanned the faces of my family.

My immediate impulse to go to him was prevented by Bey’s firm grip. "Wait" he whispered

Tom had begun to tremble, his eyes darting in panic as I made no move towards him and a small helpless whimper of abandonment escaped his lips.

And that was when my mother charged. Like a furious mother hen she swept forwards and swept Tom into her arms, wrapping herself around him as though protecting him from the world.

For a moment Tom froze and then he gave in to her warm embrace, sagging weakly against her soft strength.

Soothing him with gentle caresses she turned her bright furious eyes on me

"What have you DONE to the poor child, Chakotay?" she snapped furiously "Don’t you FEED him?"

And at that my sisters ran forward too, all snapping reproachful glances at me as they rushed to protect my poor, battered, starved and obviously abused husband.

"Women" Bey chuckled in my ear, "Let them take care of him, not even Starfleet can defeat a group of protective women, Chak. He’s in good hands now."

Part 54

T’PEL

When the time of Pon Farr came upon me, despite my long-time attachment to my husband Tuvok, it would have been illogical to refuse Verdick’s offer to become my new mate. I had four children to consider and far too little training to rely on meditative techniques alone to resolve my biological conflict.

Therefore, I was satisfied that Tuvok had also acted properly in taking Kathryn Janeway as his mate. It was my understanding that they had been alone at the time and therefore his choice was governed by chance rather than conscious decision.

However, the original mind-link between my husband and myself was too strong for me to consider that our new mates would take precedence over our original attachment. We did, after all, have a family together.

It was illogical that he would choose to remain with the human woman now that he had returned to the Alpha Quadrant. Verdick was understandably disappointed at Tuvok’s return, but gave me no argument when I expressed my intention to return to my original mate. Our association had never been intended to be permanent after all.

It took a little time to arrange transport to DS9 but the trivial problems that met my arrangements were inconsequential in comparison to my urge to reclaim my mate. I missed Tuvok; his absence had left a hole that Verdick could not fill. Had I been younger, I might have foolishly imagined that the pounding in my heart was due to emotion, but I was mature enough to recognise it as merely the anticipation of the resolving of a separation that should never have occurred.

As I journeyed towards Deep Space 9, I was advised of the peculiar happenings between the Maquis Chakotay and the son of Admiral Paris, but foolishly concluded that the news was human gossip that had no bearing on my own situation.

~~~

TOM

Chakotay’s mother and sisters kidnapped me. I have no other explanation.

One moment I was standing on the landing field, staggering under the weight of Chakotay’s apparent desertion, the next moment I was surrounded by a gaggle of chattering females, taking turns to smother me in ample soft breasts.

I vaguely remember being half-led, half-carried to a waiting horse-drawn buggy and then lost awareness of the subsequent journey as hunger and tiredness overwhelmed me.

Cushioned by the firm but yielding bodies of the women, I was rattled and rumbled towards the family’s homestead.

I DO remember looking frantically for Chakotay, who had evidently not been invited to accompany our journey, but his mother’s quiet lilting voice soothed me back to complacency and the rest of the ride became an indistinct blur.

I must have slept, because I awoke in a soft bed in a darkened room, my left hand held tightly in those of Chakotay’s mother.

"Where -?" I managed weakly

"You are HOME, Thomas." She said softly, her bronze, wizened face softening as she looked at me.

There was something so simple and honest about her, that I believed her. Those four words were like an application of balm on an open wound, both soothing and stinging. I closed my eyes against sudden tears. Somehow, these days, my emotions were running so close to the surface that I had no defenses.

"Oh, little one, don’t cry." She whispered, running a gentle hand over my cheekbones in a gentle caress "You are my son’s beloved, the keeper of his soul, and that makes you MY son, too."

"Then, then you don’t hate me?" I queried in bemused gratitude.

She laughed, not mockingly but rather with a gentleness that rocked my fragile soul.

"I find it hard to believe that anyone could hate you, Thomas, you have a pure spirit, it shines in your eyes like the promise of daybreak. And yet you have strength too, I sense it, the heart of a warrior beats beneath your breast, Thomas."

"Some warrior." I muttered bitterly, remembering my earlier pathetic performance on the landing field. Yet again, I had faced my fear with a whimper rather than with courage.

Chakotay’s mother smiled enigmatically, her face folding into the familiar dimples of her son. Releasing one hand she lay it on my chest, directly above my heart and closed her eyes in concentration. When she finally spoke her voice was distant.

"I see a great bird, circling the sun, his cries thrilling the brave and panicking the faint-hearted. He soars on the breast of the wind, all-seeing and wise and his enemies quail beneath his beating wings."

Panicked, I felt my heart leap to a faster rhythm. She opened her eyes slowly and looked at me as though she could see right into my very soul.

"You are touched by the spirits, Thomas, they move in you. You are a vessel by which an old conflict will finally be resolved."

"What spirits? What conflict?" I demanded

But she shook her head in confusion at my words.

"I don’t know, Thomas, my visions are never clear but they are always true. You have taken a step on the Mystery Walk. Great peril surrounds you. Many enemies pursue you. The enemies wear the faces of friends. Friends wear the faces of enemies. I see confusion, and conflict and death."

"Whose death? Mine? Chakotay’s?" I asked in panic. Despite the bizarre strangeness of her words, they rang a chime of truth in my heart. It never even occurred to me to disbelieve her.

"The future is not yet set. The Mystery Walk is a road with many forks. Your own choices will decide the final outcome. I sense that you alone hold the power to choose victory or defeat."

"What should I do? How can I KNOW?"

"Listen to your heart, Thomas. That is all anyone can do."

~~~

CHAKOTAY

I was helpless to prevent the abduction of Tom. I had learned at an early age that my mother was as relentless and unstoppable as the tide. Evidently, my sisters were following in her footsteps.

Beyvahl kept his firm grip on my shoulders until the buggy disappeared in a trail of dust and then he turned to me.

"Wabashaw has convened the Great Council. He has requested the presence of yourself and your companions. Judgment must be made."

"But, what about Tom?" I asked in confusion

"I had intended to take all four of you but now I have seen your husband it is obvious that he hasn’t the strength to handle any conflict."

Although his words were meant kindly, I stiffened at the suggestion that Tom was weak. Tom had suffered physical and psychological trauma that would have destroyed a weaker man. His current incapacity was not evidence of a faint-heart. The very fact that he was here at all proved his bravery beyond doubt.

"If you judge him, Bey, judge me as well. Whatever wounds he bears were inflicted by me." I finally replied, my voice full of self-loathing.

~~~

JEAN-LUC

The further Data delved into Voyager’s records, retrieving a number of ‘deleted’ files, the more discrepancies we found in Captain Janeway’s story.

From what I read, for the first five years of Voyager’s return, both Tom and Chakotay had been impeccable officers. Well, perhaps Tom had not been "impeccable"; his exploits on the Monean homeworld had been a clear breach of the Prime Directive. Then again, had I been in Janeway’s position I would have privately applauded his actions. To sentence Tom to both the Brig AND demotion had been extremely harsh for what had been, after all, a humanitarian gesture.

It was strange. Janeway had clearly been Tom’s champion in the beginning; her promotion of him to Lieutenant had been a masterful decision, inspiring in him loyalty and a desperate urge to please her.

He had clearly made every effort to live up to her expectations. He had taken his "second-chance" and made the most of it. His flying skills had even single-handedly saved the crew on a number of occasions.

At the same time, Chakotay had been an exemplary First Officer. None of his actions could be construed as anything but honorable by a reasonable person. It was only Kathryn’s OPINIONS of the reasons for his good behavior that cast any doubt upon him.

And despite her assertion that she had ALWAYS distrusted him, it was clear from the logs that for the first couple of years Kathryn had been totally happy with Chakotay. It was only in the third year that her personal log began to show distrust and dislike, finally culminating in diatribes of near-hatred in the final year.

Kathryn had told the Starfleet investigators that Chakotay had taken advantage of Tom’s paralysis. Her recovered personal files showed a different perspective. In her private logs she accused TOM of being a vampire, sucking the life out of Chakotay, destroying him with his selfish dependence.

Looking further back, to the time of Tom’s accident, it was Chakotay NOT Janeway who had demanded that Tom be forced to live with his injuries.

It had been Chakotay who had hauled Tom out of sickbay everyday for nearly a year, forcing him to face his injuries and get on with his life.

Kathryn Janeway’s vilification of Chakotay made no sense. Her interpretation of the events was flawed. She sounded more like a spurned lover than a Starfleet Captain, I mused.

And that’s when all the pieces fell into place. It wasn’t a complete picture by any means, but it all made a sick kind of sense.

Captain Janeway had fallen in love with her First Officer. At some point in the third year he had evidently spurned her advances. She had subsequently married Tuvok, apparently not a marriage made in heaven, and except for the odd note of bitterness in her logs had been resigned to the situation until Chakotay had fallen in love with Tom.

Harry’s bizarre accusation that she had attempted to leave Tom on V’rakn’hal, Chakotay’s race to retrieve him and her subsequent decision to leave them BOTH, suddenly added up.

The only real mystery was why the hell had Tuvok helped her cover her actions up?

Harry had told me that it was Tuvok who had forced Janeway to wait for the couple and that the Vulcan had evidently been disgusted enough by her actions to actually sever their marriage-link for several months.

Had the arrival of Angel on Voyager and Tom’s resultant breakdown truly convinced Tuvok that Chakotay WAS the villain that Janeway had begun to paint or was he acting out of jealousy, simply seizing an opportunity to destroy the man who so obsessed his wife?

The problem with Vulcans was that they were so damned self-controlled that it was sometimes easy to forget WHY they had to control their feelings. Under the cold exterior of a Vulcan beat a ravaging beast – five minutes with any Romulan could teach you that.

It was time, I decided, for another "chat" with Lieutenant Commander Tuvok.

~~~

OWEN

The urgent Starfleet message was patched straight through to my quarters on the Enterprise.

The ship Chakotay had stolen had been located. Stupidly, like any whipped cur, he had run straight home to Dorvan V.

The U.S.S. Endeavor was already in orbit over the planet, her requests to retrieve the criminal being thwarted by the so-called government of the mud ball, in what was evidently a petty show of spite over the old Cardassian occupation.

The Dorvans were maintaining that they had no extradition treaty with the Federation. They were denying the Endeavor’s request to rescue Tom. They were even refusing to return the EMH that was clearly the property of Starfleet OR the stolen Heran ship.

Intelligence had reported that a ship full of the Herans was already on route to retrieve their property. The last thing I needed was a group of genetically engineered freaks getting involved in the negotiations.

Deciding that if you want a job doing properly, you should do it yourself, I marched to the bridge.

Picard had disappeared back onto DS9 and God only knew where the hell Jacqueline had hidden herself but I decided that I was better off without either of them. Picard’s insane conspiracy theories and Jacqueline’s vapid blonde foolishness would only be a hindrance to retrieving Tom.

So I took command of the Enterprise and ordered her to Dorvan.

Go To Part 55